In school I took a negotiation course with a teacher who said you lose every negotiation where you don’t ask for what you want. The first rule of negotiating, he went on to say, is to ask for what you want.
When you want something from someone else, before you ever get to talk to the other person you ask yourself a question. You may ask yourself am I worth it? Do I deserve it? Is this fair? Do I want to go through the effort of asking? Can I do this? Can I handle the rejection if they say no? Or any of a number of other questions.
The best way to get what you want is first to clearly define what you want. Super simple concept and yet one that can prevent people from getting their goals met. Once you define what it is you want, the next step is to ask for it. The more clearly it is that you understand what it is you want and why, the easier it will be to make the decision of whether or not to ask for it.
The most important thing to realize is that although everyone questions whether they should ask for something, only those who ask can get what they want.
So next time there is something you want, try asking for it. Be direct and sincere, and see where it takes you. The worst that happens is you are back where you started and know you gave it your best shot. On the upside, you may just get exactly what you want.
